10.30.2004

Gentlemen,

A friend gave me a copy of the bulletin, and let me know that they have missed our family in our church recently and had been praying for our children to get over their chest colds. They wanted to make sure that in our absence, we were still kept abreast of the announcements and prayer requests that are published in the bulletin. It was a very thoughtful and heartfelt gesture.

After we parted ways, I opened the bulletin only to feel my heart sink.

“Lateness for the morning service dishonors God by making it difficult for us to begin on time and disturbs those who come early and are beginning to worship. Let’s all get organized during the week and especially on Saturday night so that we can all come to meet with the Lord and His people. Try to get to worship and get settled ten minute before nine”. – From the Oct 24 bulletin insert.

“Daylight Savings Time is next Saturday night. You have one hour extra sleep that night. Prepare to be on time for worship the next morning.” – From the main Announcements section of the Oct 24th bulletin.

The wording in the insert, and reinforced by that in the Announcements section, is done in a spirit completely opposite of Colossians 4:6 “Let your speech [be] always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.”

Rather than using graceful speech and gently reminding brothers and sisters of the clocks changing, which would have sufficed, the communications from leadership pointed a pharisaical finger (Matthew 23) at latecomers and labeled them as “difficult,” causing “disturbance” and worse, “dishonoring to God.”

Whether or not these assertions are true (and I say this because most of us in the pews are not inconvenienced if people come in a few minutes late, get up to attend to their children’s needs, or make a quick dash to the restroom – and are instead thankful and rejoicing that people are able to attend at all), isn’t the Biblical approach to confront people individually rather than by publicly shaming them? And even then, in love and with encouragement – two characteristics absent from these statements?

A number of years ago, while attending a Baptist church where people wore “nothing less than Sunday’s best”, I remember going to one of their summer revival services. The church had hired an “evangelist” to come speak, and we were told to bring our friends. The big, yellow tent, hard metal folding chairs and grassy meadow floor was in sharp contrast to that of the velvet-padded pews and numerous stained glass windows our congregation was accustomed. With a number of unchurched individuals in our midst, the evangelist relayed the following story:

A pastor was preaching one Sunday, and, in the middle of the sermon, the door in the back of the church opened and a young man entered from the street. He was late, and was wearing a black leather jacket with chains, blue jeans with holes in the knees, and his hair was dyed green. The pastor looked up from the pulpit and seized the opportunity to use the visitor as a sermon illustration. He went on to say how real Christians don’t dress like the world, let alone come into church late and looking disrespectful – and that people who do such things are sinful and should repent. Mortified, the young man turned around and left. As he drove home that day, the pastor was very happy for having rid the “evil” influence from his flock. But, later, the Holy Spirit broke him and he was forever haunted by the fact that his words had caused this stranger, who had mustered up courage to come to church maybe for the first time, to leave and without the experiencing the love of God.

While it is an honorable goal to make it to church ten minutes early, the message that visitors may get from a statement worded like this is “you’d better be on time to church or else you’re not welcome here.”

When I read the bulletin, I could not help but think of Mary Judge. What does this statement communicate to a woman who is struggling to make appointments on time without Colin’s help? How would this make her feel if she chose to spend a few moments to take a precious phone call from her husband in Iraq while she’s on the way out the door? Is she “dishonoring God” by coming in late? How about Rod Mitchell, when he comes straight to church after working hard all night long and walks in the middle of a hymn? What of those who are providentially hindered for other reasons?

As you read this, please do not distance yourself from these examples and say that you don’t mean these individuals, but rather are referring to a handful of “problem” people struggling, perhaps, with the sin of laziness. Even if this is the case, you will not win sinners by public shame and embarrassment. Habitual latecomers or first time offenders, would you not rather that people made it in time to hear life-giving biblical teaching, rather than shaming them into not coming at all – out of fear for “dishonoring God” by their being late?

Furthermore, the statements in the bulletin might lead readers to think it is okay to view and label latecomers as “dishonoring to God”, “disturbing” and “difficult”. It is sinful to cast such aspersions and to lead others to do the same! You must apologize for this!

You must realize that gospel is not beating people over the head with their faults and throwing a progression of verses about depravity, Christ’s sacrifice and our unworthiness of it. Such a gospel not only personally discouraging, it minimizes scripture in that it contains no grace, victory over sin, or hope for the future! The gospel is seen through a Christlike attitude, and as leaders, you must take the opportunity – nay, responsibility – to demonstrate this!

The Godly approach to this situation would be to personally and lovingly go to those who are habitually late and ask if there is anything you can do to help make it easier for them to attend church – instead of discouraging them with, “Do you know you’re being a disturbance!?!” It would encourage the positive to say, “We would love to have you participate with us from start to finish” or, “I noticed you came in late today, but we are glad that you are here.” These statements graciously acknowledge tardiness, but also let people know that they are more important to you than the appearance of perfection.

By setting this example as leaders, and equipping the congregation to do the same, you are sharing a “gospel of grace” (Acts 20:24) – one that will cause people to be won by your love for them.

Please be more careful as leaders. It is critical that you consider what you communicate in everything you do – whether the language comes from your body (such as a genuine smile, making a beeline to newcomers, rolling up your sleeves when there is a need), in print or from your mouth – that the message you sending to IPC and our guests is Christlike and gives testimony to a gospel of grace.

With much love,

Sarah Joy Albrecht